Not long ago I decided to let Christ take control of my life, but since then I have experienced an avalanche of confrontations in my home. My wife discovered that I had been unfaithful, and she is now distant.

I love my home. I have left the other woman, but she won’t leave me in peace. She says I am her life. The woman I really love is my wife....

I beg Christ to help me, even to take my life, because I know that the Bible says that the wages of sin is death. I would prefer death to this hell that torments me day and night.

Dear Friend,

We congratulate you for the wise decision that you made to begin a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, God’s Son. You now have Christ as your best friend and, if you strengthen the relationship through prayer and reading the Bible, you can expect that He will guide you through difficult times and decisions.

However, Christ does not save you from the natural consequences of your actions. The natural consequences of having been unfaithful to your wife are the difficulties you’ve had in your relationship with her and the complications that have resulted with the other woman. You describe them as a kind of hell that you would like to be delivered from. And yet facing the consequences of your actions is the honorable thing to do, while escaping the consequences is cowardly.

You have done the right thing to terminate the relationship with the other woman, but you cannot expect your wife to trust you or to treat you as before. You betrayed her and she is hurt. It will take time for her to heal and for you to prove to her that you do love her and that you can be trusted in the future.

As for the other woman, it is critically important that you stop all communication with her immediately. When you respond to her, even if it is out of some sense of compassion, it just encourages her to continue to pursue you. Change your phone number if necessary. In the meantime, show all messages to your wife and let her have complete access to all your communications. That will show her that you have nothing to hide.

You correctly quote the Bible verse in Romans 6:23, and it is true that the wages of sin is death. However, you have forgotten that Christ already died on the cross to pay the penalty for your sins. When you asked for forgiveness of your sins, He could forgive you because He had already paid for them. There is no need for you to die, nor even to punish yourself, because He suffered and died in your place. What you need to do is live in a way that honors His name. Ask Him to give you peace and strength in the midst of the turmoil.

We wish you the best,

Linda

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