The following topics are the most common ones that we deal with in the cases that we receive. Click on any topic to find links to those cases.

Marriage (Conflicts / Insults)

10, 44, 54, 95, 117, 123, 130, 140, 159, 162, 195, 232, 277, 279, 303, 306, 315, 316, 333, 345, 353, 379, 392, 397, 427, 435, 458, 466, 546, 550, 552, 572, 586, 607, 628, 633, 636

Marriage (Indifference / Expression of Affection)

45, 104, 115, 176, 178, 231, 235, 245, 280, 286, 317, 321, 455, 470, 489, 519, 542, 551, 587, 601, 624

Marriage (Adultery / Infidelity)

4, 8, 29, 61, 71, 90, 106, 121, 141, 152, 166, 174, 178, 200, 216, 236, 259, 289, 301, 323, 334, 339, 347, 356, 368, 394, 412, 421, 447, 453, 484, 486, 504, 515, 524, 531, 540, 548, 562, 574, 598, 617, 639, 640

Marriage (Spousal Abuse)

39, 51, 80, 107, 150, 157, 190, 243, 252, 275, 307, 332, 384, 406, 413, 467, 469, 582

Abandonment of Spouse

27, 30, 110, 126, 146, 182, 228, 311, 329, 334, 347, 481, 570, 580, 581, 611

Jealousy / Envy

8, 39, 119, 248, 275, 298, 317, 378, 422, 430, 441, 458, 468, 516, 525, 526, 555, 567, 615, 627, 641

Divorce

60, 94, 189, 219, 252, 316, 453, 461, 471, 532, 537, 538, 556, 560, 574, 629, 635

Cohabitation

41, 103, 108, 113, 153, 160, 213, 260, 310, 342, 399, 417, 465, 473, 483, 494, 517, 520, 522, 525, 533, 537, 541, 544, 576, 584, 599, 600, 616, 634

Romantic Relationships / Courtship

28, 61, 66, 76, 83, 105, 121, 137, 145, 171, 181, 191, 192, 193, 206, 213, 223, 246, 248, 253, 256, 264, 265, 270, 276, 284, 285, 287, 296, 298, 300, 302, 308, 314, 324, 327, 328, 335, 365, 383, 386, 395, 396, 399, 415, 418, 428, 430, 433, 438, 472, 476, 482, 487, 496, 563, 575, 433, 438, 472, 476, 478, 479, 482, 487, 496, 534, 563, 583, 589, 605, 612, 621, 622, 632, 637, 642, 643

Infatuation / Falling in Love

16, 50, 152, 184, 210, 232, 250, 259, 260, 300, 301, 308, 314, 324, 334, 346, 375, 402, 404, 424, 428, 440, 446, 450, 488, 493, 497, 515, 530, 534, 539, 577, 590, 630, 638

Sexual Immorality

12, 40, 28, 82, 89, 96, 118, 131, 145, 160, 168, 173, 191, 201, 218, 227, 233, 238, 247, 260, 269, 270, 284, 289, 290, 299, 310, 319, 325, 333, 350, 354, 365, 375, 383, 389, 396, 401, 407, 408, 411, 417, 436, 437, 456, 485, 487, 508, 517, 524, 525, 530, 533, 570, 437, 456, 487, 517, 524, 525, 530, 533, 570, 604, 618, 634

Pornography

7, 130, 186, 227, 288, 343, 408, 626

Social Media / Internet

36, 64, 272, 322, 336, 346, 356, 361, 524, 608

Family

5, 33, 46, 53, 55, 56, 81, 95, 100, 108, 128, 133, 138, 142, 161, 172, 188, 201, 207, 220, 221, 247, 258, 266, 319, 326, 327, 332, 388, 439, 463, 492, 506, 511, 520, 557, 567 557, 567

In-laws

35, 85, 264, 279, 335, 362, 372, 414, 422, 442, 457, 505, 513, 636, 645

Parental Responsibility

6, 25, 27, 37, 89, 97, 98, 102, 109, 112, 113, 132, 144, 146, 147, 160, 179, 182, 203, 218, 219, 236, 238, 241, 251, 267, 292, 302, 304, 312, 323, 329, 339, 342, 355, 364, 372, 376, 385, 416, 419, 421, 445, 456, 461, 462, 465, 505, 507, 528, 543, 599, 617, 619 619

Small children (Discipline / Instruction / Care)

26, 57, 59, 204, 240, 257, 271, 299, 305, 309, 311, 321, 348, 357, 381, 429, 434, 454, 471, 483, 503, 583, 585, 602, 607

Adolescents (Discipline / Instruction / Care)

19, 38, 72, 78, 87, 114, 154, 169, 175, 211, 215, 217, 254, 263, 290, 343, 349, 352, 370, 390, 420, 479, 490, 522, 533, 541, 558, 633

Adult children

70, 149, 164, 198, 226, 282, 283, 331, 377, 382, 423, 448, 478, 509, 554, 560, 578, 596, 623

Responsibilities of children

9, 14, 20, 63, 111, 143, 155, 170, 214, 224, 244, 274, 291, 313, 337, 340, 358, 366, 371, 374, 400, 409, 452, 492, 518, 564, 620

Adoption of Children

34, 57, 196, 204, 241, 257, 268, 613

Abortion

1, 42, 127, 194, 233, 255, 268, 297, 369, 375, 387

Child Abuse / Rape

3, 11, 68, 73, 168, 177, 192, 201, 215, 225, 247, 290, 330, 344, 391, 407, 411, 437, 450, 485, 508, 514, 519, 549, 563, 571, 573, 597, 603, 625

Abuse

3, 11, 23, 32, 41, 49, 68, 73, 77, 99, 103, 129, 134, 164, 168, 177, 180, 187, 200, 202, 219, 230, 237, 309, 312, 330, 335, 340, 345, 348, 349, 366, 380, 391, 392, 431, 484, 494, 502, 514, 518, 541, 548, 557, 566, 629

Guilt

11, 42, 74, 90, 93, 96, 118, 151, 153, 158, 163, 170, 185, 189, 194, 203, 208, 225, 235, 249, 262, 268, 293, 297, 306, 312, 319, 325, 330, 338, 341, 344, 368, 369, 371, 374, 377, 387, 389, 391, 408, 443, 445, 451, 491, 495, 508, 514, 521, 543, 546, 559, 560, 569, 579, 593, 642

Repentance

1, 96, 127, 148, 151, 158, 165, 187, 229, 255, 312, 336, 338, 354, 363, 387, 389, 425, 437, 507, 591, 594, 628

Forgiveness

32, 45, 94, 139, 178, 255, 339, 349, 350, 361, 362, 379, 380, 382, 429, 453, 459, 513, 514, 518, 549, 571, 625

Depression / Anxiety / Panic

31, 52, 86, 91, 100, 158, 239, 350, 369, 377, 393, 400, 443, 449, 460, 474, 475, 523, 528, 529, 565, 568, 577, 588, 595

Illness

13, 15, 31, 56, 67, 69, 75, 84, 86, 91, 115, 136, 167, 173, 193, 197, 209, 239, 249, 271, 320, 344, 356, 393, 444, 449, 457, 460, 464, 473, 474, 475, 480, 527, 529, 532, 553, 576, 595

Death

47, 52, 67, 75, 124, 156, 167, 183, 205, 261, 262, 351, 373, 495, 498, 610, 643

Finances

22, 48, 54, 66, 97, 138, 150, 161, 221, 222, 241, 242, 274, 276, 277, 318, 342, 359, 376, 378, 397, 400, 427, 432, 552, 564, 586

Work

58, 79, 97, 117, 142, 199, 220, 240, 266, 269, 277, 295, 296, 235, 371, 409, 432, 434, 452, 499, 501, 528

Bad Habits

2, 18, 38, 71, 83, 98, 148, 170, 212, 214, 226, 294, 326, 331, 341, 363, 388, 435, 436, 441, 485, 569, 606

Anger

23, 77, 125, 208, 230, 237, 295, 307, 348, 381, 382, 426, 431, 459, 469, 477, 497, 503, 512, 545, 547, 614

Lying

43, 62, 159, 220, 242, 258, 316, 322, 398, 401, 409, 491, 500, 514, 526, 556, 608

Robbery / Fraud

17, 65, 101, 135, 148, 185, 211, 222, 242, 254, 281, 315, 371, 409, 510, 536, 592

Hypocrisy

234, 332, 345, 509, 591, 609

Step-parents

77, 99, 114, 122, 164, 215, 257, 263, 319, 352, 420, 485, 511, 520, 550, 571, 575, 607, 620

The English translation of each case will be available here each week. A new case will be posted each Wednesday and will correspond with the case posted at conciencia.net. Please pray for these desperate people who are searching for answers! Pray for their immediate need, but more importantly, pray that God will speak to their hearts so that they may come to know Him in a personal way.

 
Case
Case 638

I fell in love with a sixteen-year-old girl. For more than a year I have been trying to start a relationship with her.

The problem is that she could be my daughter, because I am thirty-four years old. My actions have shown her that I am concerned about her well-being. She wanted a cell phone, so I gave her one. Her bedroom was in bad shape, and I fixed it up for her, even adding air conditioning.... But she never shows appreciation for my actions or efforts. I don’t know what to do.

Dear Friend,

Thank you for telling us your story and asking for our counsel. We hope that you will follow the advice that we have for you.

When you say that you are old enough to be her father, you are absolutely correct. But what may not be clear to you is that the ideal age difference between romantic partners varies according to their life stage. When one of them is fifty, an eighteen-year age difference may not be as significant; but for a minor, such as this sixteen-year-old girl, the ideal age of her boyfriends should be her own age or no more than two years older.

Pediatric research has shown that the brain of a person that age is not even fully developed, and it may not be for another five to ten years.1 In the teenager’s brain, the pre-frontal cortex has not yet made all of the necessary connections. As a result, most teenagers lack impulse control, and they don’t always recognize the relationship between an action and its consequences.

Because the pre-frontal cortex is not fully developed, teenagers must depend on the part of their brains called the amygdala to help them make decisions. The amygdala tends to consider emotions more than reason. That is why many teenagers make decisions based on how they feel rather than on what they know.

It is very important that teenagers have relationships with other teenagers, both of whom are in the same life stage. Teenagers are not ready for the expectations of adult relationships. Their brains are not ready to make adult decisions.

This may be why the girl accepted your gifts, which made her happy, without reciprocating your affections. An adult woman would know that you are spending money as a way of showing that you care for her and want a relationship. A teenager, on the other hand, just takes what is offered without considering what it means.

We don’t know what country’s laws you are subject to. However, in many countries a man of your age would be judged harshly for considering a romantic relationship with a teenager. If the girl’s parents have not objected to your interest in her, they are likely motivated by financial gain rather than by their daughter’s best interests.

We strongly advise you to forget about this girl and to spend your time participating in activities for adults. If you ask God, He will give you the strength and wisdom that you need.

We wish you the best,

Linda
____________________
1 “What’s Going on in the Teenage Brain?”, Healthy Children Magazine, Fall 2007, American Academy of Pediatrics <https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/ teen/Pages/Whats-Going-On-in-the-Teenage-Brain.aspx> Online 30 July 2020.

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